The DGS Wall of Shame Team

So, in a going away present for NHL 11, before NHL 12 came out, I put together quite possibly the worst possible roster in the history of current NHL players. I based this roster not off ratings, but over actual performance during the 2010-11 season. To be eligible to be on this team, the player had to play in the 2009-10 season or 2010-11 season at the NHL level (either in preseason or regular season). Since the Edmonton Oilers were the worst team (record wise) in the NHL last season, they had the honor of icing this team.

Also, players that made this team had to be overall horrible. Obviously icing a set of goons and defensive defenseman would never score any goals, so that was out. On top of that, young players who were waiver exempt were let off the hook as well, so if a player was sent down without clearing waivers, they weren't eligible. Players on ELC's weren't added either, again, young players get the benefit of the doubt that they might become something, some day.

Goalies:
Steve Mason 1
Vesa Toskala 35


Explanation: Who's been a bigger letdown than Mason? A Calder Cup before completely falling apart lands him as the starting goalie Also, see how Toskala's NHL career ended. Michael Leighton would have made the list save a miracle playoff run and the fact that I gave him the benefit of the doubt.

Defenseman:

Pair 1- Wade Redden 6 and Matt Walker 8
Pair 2- Brett Lebda 22 and Cam Barker 45
Pair 3- Nick Boynton 44 and Jeff Finger 4
7th D- Bryan McCabe 28

They're all traffic pylons. All of them. Except McCabe, he's a turnover machine.

Forwards:

Line 1: Nikolay Zherdev 93-Scott Gomez 91-Hugh Jessiman 47
Line 2: Alex Kovalev 27-Brian Rolston 12-Scottie Upshall 7
Line 3: Matt Cooke 24 (A)-Chris Drury 23 (C)-Jason Blake 33
Line 4: Chris Neil 25-Jamie Langenbrunner 15 (A)-Trevor Gillies 14
13th FWD:  Rob Schremp 13

So I think I need to explain somethings here. Gomez and Drury were 7+ cap hits that have done nothing with their careers except be completely mediocre. Sure Brian Campbell is the same way on D, but at least as a puck mover, he has some value. These forwards all have major holes in their game and quite literally cripple the team's they play for. Brian Campbell actually is needed to get to the Panthers to the salary floor so he serves a purpose that his team quite literally cannot. Rob Schremp, Scottie Upshall and Hugh Jessiman are all massive failures of first round picks. Gillies is an exception to my minor league rule due to having had more PIMS 169 than TOI 119:36. This isn't an enforcer, this is an out of control maniac. Kovalev, Rolston, and Blake are all players who haven't lived up to their potential on the ice. Langenbrunner was a player who fell apart everywhere he played during last season.


So I turned off the cap, and iced this team. The following record happened.

Edmonton Oilers: 21-57-4

Leading Scorer: Nikolay Zherdev 41G 33A 77P
Leading Goals: Nikolay Zherdev
Leading Assists: Scott Gomez 13G 52A 65P

Defenseman:
Leading Goals: Wade Redden 7G 31A
Leading Assists: Brett Lebda 6G 32A
Leading Points: Lebda and Redden

Leading PIMs: Chris Neil and Matt Walker each had 241
Trevor Gillies only had 202

+/-: Brett Lebda and Alex Kovalev each had a team worst -29, Team best was Upshall +2

Goalies: (Season was simmed, starts were alternated with Mason starting game 1 via winning of a coin flip)

Steve Mason: 41 Starts 43 games:  17-23-1, .861 SV% 3.63 GAA.
Vesa Toskala: 41 Starts 43 games: 3-34-3, .765 SV%, 4.53 GAA.

Goodbye NHL 11, this is your swan song.

Things to Do in Anticipation of NHL 11

So, with some new features of NHL 11 being announced, we at DGS got really excited in anticipation of the game's release. After reading that article, we noticed that several things were missing from this game that should be included. Luckily, we have the list right here. So EA Sports, if you're reading, here is what you need to make NHL 11 totally awesome


First off: Mini Games! We all love the, like the mini shoot out game and such, but branch out a little guys seriously. We have a couple ideas for you

Buffet Wars:
Have Tim Thomas, Martin Brodeur, and Kyle Wellwood in line at a buffet table, most food consumed in a set amount of time wins.


Sloppy Seconds:
Basically a game where Sean Avery picks up your favorite players ex, then unleashes a series of silly comments about it.

Auger Mode aka Ref Mode
Basically, you become the referee, if you want to go out and get someone, but don't feel like fighting them, bingo, you have an alternative.





Also, for more realistic game play:

The following things should happen:

-Players refuse to sign contracts with Edmonton
-Marian Gaborik should be injured every time he touches the puck
-Moving Rick DiPietro out of the goal crease results in his receiving a crippling knee injury
-Mike Green will NOT play defense

Have "playoff attributes" for when your team in GM mode hits the post season, this will result in the following changes:

-Any player on the San Jose Sharks having their rating drop from 90 to 0
-Joe Thornton actually ends up with negative attributes in the playoffs
-Jaroslav Halak's rating is equal to those shooting against him
-Ville Leino and Danny Briere get perfect ratings in the playoffs only,
-Alex Semin disappears


Bring in a "dive mode"

Basically, instead of deking, certain players, like Crosby, Carcillo, Max Lapierre will all dive rather than deke around checks.


More Realistic GM Mode:

Need to unload a horrible contract: Don't worry, MTL will trade for it.
Need to acquire first round draft picks: The Maple Leafs are selling.
Need to acquire NHL talent for Vesa Toskala: Calgary's here to help
Need to throw out NTCs like candy: JFJ is in the house


More Realistic Crowds:
ACC is empty
Habs fans riot after games
#ThrowTheSnake
During Senators/Leafs games in Ottawa, Senators players get to hear the Boos
Southern US Markets get next to nil attendance



If we missed something, include it in the comments please.