Previewing the Second Round Matchups

Just like we did for the first round, it's time to preview the other playoff series that don't involve the Flyers. So here we go.

-Western Conference-

#5 Nashville vs #1 Vancouver

How They Got Here: Nashville shot and killed a Duck, Vancouver tossed a Monkey off their back.
What to look for: Will Shea Weber's beard destroy Roberto Luongo?
Who moves on: The Predators


#2 San Jose vs #3 Detroit

How They Got Here: San Jose committed regicide, the Red Wings put some whiteout on the Coyotes

What to look for: Will Joe Thornton realize it's May BEFORE senility sets in on the Red Wings?

Who moves on: Kyle Wellwood disposes of the octopus by making calamari and eating: Sharks move on again.

-Eastern Conference-

#1 Washington vs #5 Tampa Bay

How They Got Here: Washington defeated the Rangers, TBL eliminated the PenGOONs

What to look for: How many of DTV's ideas come true?

Who moves on: Gotta say WSH because TBL will pay for the injustice of keeping Crosby out of the NHL for 9 months?

The Flyers preview will come Saturday

Things Other People in the NHL want for Christmas

Yesterday we showed you what the Flyers want for Christmas, well, we also found out what the rest of the NHL wants for Christmas, here's what we found out.


Taylor Hall: To hopefully get a chance to play on an NHL team.

The New Jersey Devils: That the CBA is followed and Kovalchuk's contract is voided.

Brian Burke: Tyler Seguin and a 2011 Lottery pick

Mike Green: Someone who can teach me how to play defense...oh crap, I got Scott Hannan instead

Henrik and Daniel Sedin: A triplet who's identical to us as well

Toronto Maple Leafs Fans: Free therapy from a psychologist...and not Down Goes Spezza

Sheldon Souray: Nothing, I finally got the fuck out of Edmonton

Sidney Crosby: A real wing

Colin Campbell: The ability to use a BlackBerry

Gary Bettman: Expansion to Havana, Mexico City, San Juan, Cairo, and Death Valley...if necessary teams will be removed from Toronto, Detroit, Montreal and Chicago

Don't Trade Vinny: A date with Marty St Louis

How This All Happened: Return of the Homer

Now, just about anyone who knows anything about hockey some people (Editor's Note- including us) seem to think that Andrej Meszaros was gonna be a huge bust when he came to Philadelphia. A certain Bolts Blogger was rejoicing like he just got N64 on Christmas. This guy was a traffic pylon who never did anything right in Tampa. Now, he's in the top 10 in the NHL in +/- and anchoring the shut-down D-pair of the Flyers with Sean O'Donnell. We're all wondering how this happened.

Well, guess what, the DGS SuperSpies caught the first conversation between Big Mesz and GM Paul Holmgren after Holmgren arrived in Philly. We're sharing it with you now.

A picture of the first meeting, unlike the movie
this time the subject is turned.

[Meszaros surrenders himself to Darth Holmgren.]

Holmgren: The Pronger has been expecting you.

Meszaros: I know...GM.

Holmgren: So, you have accepted the truth?

Meszaros: I've accepted the truth that you were once Paul Holmgren, an NHL coach.

Holmgren: That job no longer has any meaning for me!

Meszaros: It is the name of your true self. You've only forgotten. I know there is good in you. The Pronger
hasn't driven it from you fully. [steps off to the side of the passageway, away from Holmgren] That was why you couldn't destroy me. That's why you won't bring me to Chris Pronger now.

Holmgren: [inspects Meszaros's hockey stick] I see you have constructed a new hockey stick. Your skills are complete. Indeed you are powerful, as the Pronger has foreseen. [bags the hockey stick again]

Meszaros: Come with me!

Holmgren: Tocchet once thought as you do. You don't know the power of the elbow! I must obey my master.

Meszaros: I will not turn. And you'll be forced to trade me.

Holmgren: If that is your destiny.

Meszaros: Search your feelings, GM. You can't do this. I feel the conflict within you! Let go of your hate!

Holmgren: It is... too late for me, son. The Pronger will show you the true nature of the Force. He is your master now.

Meszaros: [resigned] Then my laziness is truly dead.



At this point, Chris Pronger jumped out of the corridor and elbowed the suck out of Meszaros. The world went on to be a better place as the Flyers hit the 25 game mark with Meszaros and O'Donnell being the top 2 guys on the team in +/-.

Tuesday Morning Coffee Break: November 9

Holy god, it's been a hell of a long time since I did one of these. It's Tuesday, so drink coffee and enjoy some other hockey blogs.

• Jason from DWYDN has some NHLOL for us. I hated one, the rest were awesome.
• Intent to Blow finds out how suspensions work because the flow chart and wheel of justice aren't enough
• DGB has the guide to booing and a certain player knows what he did.
• Hab It Her Way makes her debut on DGS telling us why Dustin Boyd got waived. Honestly, what I love most about this amazing Habs blog is what she says about me in her blog roll.
• DTV has some special Crosby information for us. I got 2 words for ya: GOT DIVING!

DGS 101: Not only is it post 101, but I'm actually gonna show you who I am

Hi everybody!

DGS on guitar, his other hobby

My name is Down Goes Spezza Matt. That's right, I have the same first name as my blogging brother. If you don't know who that is, then you must be new here, welcome. My blogging brother is Don't Trade Vinny.


Also, you may be curious as to what I look like, well, I posted a pic of me on twitter about a week ago (ironically seeing a picture of me was more popular than my previous 3 posts, the conclusion I've drawn is that I'm incredibly good looking.)

So here we go, the official DGS bio


Name: Matt Bernot
Height: 5'9" (Claims 5'11")
Weight: 145lbs (Claims 170lbs)
Age: 21
DOB: October 11, 1988
Position: Defense/LW
Shoots: Right


You can follow the real me on twitter @MattBernot if you're interested, I rarely tweet on it though.

Random facts about me in no particular order

• I'm taller than the forwards on the Habs top line
  
• I'm going for a dual degree on Political Science and Psychology
  
• My career coal is work for the FBI as a Criminal Profiler in the BAU
  
• I'm the unofficial psychologist of the blogosphere
  
• My favorite players who are currently in the NHL are Simon Gagne, Kimmo Timonen, Mike Modano and Mikko Koivu
  
• My favorite players when I was younger were John LeClair, Eric Desjardins, Peter Forsberg, Joe Sakic, Adam Deadmarsh and Ron Hextall

So there you go, please don't sue me.

DGS 100th Post Spectacular

Hey guys! Guess what! DGS has a 100th post event for today, and tomorrow the 101st post.

Back in April, when I started, I had to beg my friends to view my site in order to get views. Now, I get a few hundred views every day. To all my loyal readers, thank you. If this is your first time here, welcome, please come back.

Those few hundred views a day are a result of some of my friends on the blogosphere. I've gotten mentioned in several other far more established blogs. Seriously, look below.

Down Goes Brown Friday Funnies April 2010

Stay Classy Linkshare Day September 2010

Intent To Blow Stuff We Missed this Week August 2010

If you want to complain, or compliment me, leave a comment in the box below or drop me an email at Down Goes Spezza.

I'd like to first give out a couple of thank-yous to some very important people.

Stay Classy
Don't Trade Vinny
Intent to Blow
Blades of Funny
Down Goes Brown
Bloge Salming
Discard What You Don't Need
Pat Kane's Loose Change



10 of my favorite posts that I've written:

• NHL Relocations
  
• NHL Tampering
  
• Jeff Carter and Scott Hartnell have a little chat on AIM
  
• Possible Expansion of the NHL
  
• Consolation Prizes for Teams Eliminated in the First Round of the Playoffs
  
• Dustin Byfuglien is Missing
  
• The Peter Laviolette Motivational Speech
  
• Seven Signs the Flyers will win the 2010 Stanley Cup (hey, I came damn close to being right)
  
• What Type of Player are you? (Part 2) (Thanks to Stay Classy for Part 1)
  
• Hockey Dictionary for Dummies (Thanks to DTV for Part 1)

If you're not following me on Twitter, click on my twitter feed on the right and head on over and check me out there. Thank you again for all your support, you guys rock.

DGS Vacation Report: Sept 2010 Trip to Florida

Well I spent a week in Florida that was rather relaxing and fun. I got to spend to time with my family, made a few new friends, met a guy who's fan of both DGS and Don't Trade Vinny, which in my book makes him awesome. I also had a pizza delivery guy named Dan E. (off his name-tag) who I tipped 18% on purpose, he got the joke too which was awesome.

Then there were the frustrations, like trying to find a Simon Gagne Lightning T-shirt, apparently they don't exist, come to think of it, hockey didn't seem to exist in Florida at all. I flipped through the Sept 10 edition of the Orlando Sentinel newspaper. There were MORE ads for guns in the paper than for any kind of hockey equipment (roller or ice) or NHL related stuff. I'll pause so you can read that again.

Moving on, I found some intelligent hockey fans in Florida that are not my family members. This was refreshing knowing that people follow the sport even though Florida media seems to refuse to acknowledge its existence. One of them, introduced to me by DTV via the interwebz showed me that there's hope for hockey in the southern USA.

Sometime after the season starts, when I hit a creative lull, I'll revisit that issue again, until then. I hope to write some posts about Flyers camp and all. So stay tuned. Soon, I will return to my humor oriented content, don't worry.

Tuesday Morning Coffee Break: September 7

Hey what do you know, Tuesday morning coffee break two weeks in a row. Sadly, I'm writing this at 2:30am and I'm falling asleep as I type, so it's just gonna be links and no clever commentary

• To make my life real easy, here's Stay Classy's link list for this week.
  
• Dan Ellis went crazy again earlier tonight, Don't Trade Vinny knows why Ellis is crazy.
  
• The Active Stick learned a lot of things this offseason, her list was hilarious. She's a Habs fan so I hope that Habs owner Michael Leighton approves of her becoming smarter.
  
• Want to see an exciting movie: Hockey Broad has a look at a new movie coming out. Hope it is good.

Now go forth and enjoy your break. Get back to work and be productive.

Tuesday Morning Coffee Break: August 31

Hey guess what, it's Tuesday, and you are bored at work. Don't worry, we have a Tuesday morning coffee break for you today. So grab some coffee, a muffin and sit back and prepare to laugh with the links DGS has for you today!!!!

• Stay Classy delivers a post on different types of hockey players in the world. Run yourself up against the profiles and see who you are.
• Intent to Blow recently became my favorite hockey blog because they mentioned me. Oh yeah, they also got the inside scoop on what Kyle Wellwood's demands for his new contract are. (Hint: NOT SALAD!)
• Hoosier Hockey helps take up the cause of bloggers being plagiarized. I support him fully (possibly because I believe in Blogger's Rights and possibly because I want to appear on his Podcast and possibly because Peter is a solid dude who's a great guy and huge DGS supporter). Enough said.
• Hockey Broad discusses Justin Bieber's role in hockey marketing. Yes I know, you probably want to puke but honestly, take a deep breath, free your mind, and just read her out. 
• Blades of Funny adds some quotes to Willie Mitchell. I laughed hard at this post. 
• Discard What You Don't Need a blogging newcomer discusses how to draft your NHL fantasy team. If I could recommend one guy over the rest on this list, it's this guy right here, Jason is a solid up and coming blogger with a brighter future than his team, the Dallas Stars. He also has a brighter future than Taylor Hall once Hall gets the hell out of Edmonton. 

Now that you've had some good reads, get back to work. Have a productive day, and we will see you tomorrow.

Sunday Brunch: A Discussion of Hilariously Hypothetical Things Related to the NHL, part 5

Well what do you know. It's Sunday again. What does that mean? *silence* It means it's Sunday Brunch time. So here we go.

A huge glove bump to DGS Supporter Don't Trade Vinny for helping me with today's discussion. (By the way, if you're not reading his blog, well you're probably illiterate because the guy is a comedic genius)

So it seems that Kovy gate is going nowhere, or is it? Today Ilya Kovalchuk announced that he is "taking his talent to south Beach to play for the Miami Heat" You know what that means. Tell me how it goes down with Kovy joining Bosh, Wade and James in Miami.

There's the scenario, now go forth and give me LULZ!

NHL Possible Expansion

Ok, so we know there's a lot of talk of movement in the NHL in terms of franchise relocations. Phoenix, the Islanders, any southern market team that fails to make money, have all been mentioned as possibly moving in the next few years. We here at DGS would like to talk about possible movement in the NHL, somewhat seriously....oh bloody hell who are we kidding? We're gonna have a lot of fun with this.

A huge glove bump, stick tap, and thank you from DGS goes to the following people who really helped make this post possible:

• Don't Trade Vinny
• Peter from Hoosier Hockey
• HockeyBroad

Now of course to have an intelligent discussion about this topic, we need to solve a few problems, like Gary Bettman

So, now that we solved that problem. We can move on and begin discussing possible NHL expansions.


We'll start with Phoenix. Honestly, I wouldn't mind seeing the Coyotes move back to Winnipeg. Also, perhaps my Canadian readers and friends could answer this for me, why has no one suggested Regina/Saskatoon as destinations for an NHL franchise, they're decently sized cities? Is there something that I'm missing? (Like conditions that make Edmonton look nice?)

(Hoosier Hockey's Peter Evans supplied me with this:
"Regina/Saskatoon will not work seeing as they don't have the much needed corporate money necessary to have a team. Yes, the Credit Union Centre can barely accomidate an NHL franchise (I mean that in the loosest way possible), but the corporate dollars just aren't there.

") If anyone wants to dispute the findings of Mr. Evans, I'm all ears.

Mississauga, Ontario is a another place that I think a team could go.

If the Coyotes need to stay in the USA, then perhaps we could give Portland, Maine a shot (Wikipedia gives the metro area of Portland at around 500,000 people)and Milwaukee, Wisconsin could get a look as well. These destinations could work for the Islanders.

Peter Evans from Hoosier Hockey has offered his opinions on some of my ideas

Portland, OR- I don't see this happening. The city has just thrown a ton of money into converting their baseball stadium into an MLS facility. They've hit a stand still on the possible location of a new minor league stadium and the city LOVES their arena that's used for their WHL franchise. I'm just not buying the city building a new facility.

Seattle- Key Arena is a horrible place to watch a hockey game. Also, it would be too small and needs renovation. Seattle doesn't want to throw down money stuff such as this. I don't see it happening.

Kansas City- New arena and they're hungry for a tenant. Here's the issue: That city does not care about hockey. They have trouble keeping minor league teams. The Scouts lasted all of two seasons and when they had preseason games last year, they couldn't even give the seats away.

Hamilton, ON- No way. Too many issues with the league not really wanting a team there. TSN estimated that with stadium renovations, fees and money spent to Toronto and Buffalo on market infringement it would cost almost a billion dollars just to have the team. That's a huge set up fee. Also I honestly believe that if you put a team in Hamilton, Buffalo will be gone within a decade.

Portland, ME- Too small, not enough corporate money. No major arena.

Quebec City- Plans in place to build a new arena, an owner waiting in the wings, tons of corporate money. More a matter of when rather than if.

Winnipeg- An arena that will need minimal renovation, ownership groups frothing at the mouth, enough community support to ensure sellouts at an incredibly high rate. Referenced as the first city on Bettman's list.

Milwaukee- They were on the short list during that last decade of expansion. There isn't much interest in pursuing NHL hockey up there. I don't really see it happening.

Hartford- The arena needs renovation. There is interest in bringing them back, it's a possibility, but I don't see it happening before bringing back QC and Winnipeg.

Now, onto NHL expansion...

No, not the Gary Bettman kind.

No, not the Sami Salo kind either.


I mean, expanding the NHL to 32 teams like the NFL.

Here me out, I have an idea for this and I think it could work. I'll do the divisions, with how I work it.

Eastern Conference

Division A
Flyers
Rangers
Devils
Penguins

Division B
Hurricanes
Thrashers
Lightning
Panthers

Division C
Islanders: Now in Mississauga or Hamilton**
Canadiens
Maple Leafs
Senators

Division D
Bruins
Sabres
Hartford (Expansion)
Capitals



Western Conference

Division A
St Louis
Chicago
Detroit
Columbus

Division B
Minnesota
Dallas
Nashville
Milwaukee (Expansion)

Division C

San Jose

Los Angeles

Anaheim

Colorado

Division D

Phoenix (Back in Winnipeg or in Regina/Saskatoon)

Vancouver

Calgary

Edmonton

I tried to keep rivalries together (Easter Div A and West Div B) while working geographically, also I kept the Canadian teams together in hopes that they draw big revenue by playing each other a lot.

As for the schedule:

other 3 teams in division

Inter-division games: 24

play 8x (4 home/4 road)

Other 3 divisions in conference

play 4x (2 home 2 road) 48

For 72 games.

Play 1 out of conference division 2x (1 home/1 road)

that's 80 games.

Play 3 teams that finished in your divisional slot (1st place vs 1st place) out of conference 2x (1 home, 1 road) for 6 more games

That's an 86 game schedule, and that's my thoughts on the topic. If you agree/disagree discuss it here. I've enlisted the help of HoosierHockey and Don't Trade Vinny for their views on the topic.

Don't Trade Vinny added this to regarding the NHL Preseason:

Extend the preseason from 4 games to at least eight games for every team, with some of the games being played in a neutral market. Then, we could see what markets generate potential expansion sites.

Places with huge collegiate hockey markets (Dakotas, Maine, etc.) could host preseason games. For instance, Boston vs. Philly preseason in Maine. Chicago vs. Vancouver or Calgary in the Dakotas.

Other places the NHL has considered could then be used also. San Jose vs. Colorado in Las Vegas. St. Louis vs. Chicago in Kansas City. Toronto vs.Ottawa in Hamilton. Columbus vs. Nashville in Indy. Not only could the sites be geographically specific based on teams, but could also be great in between travel points during the preseason, which could in turn provide less early season fatigue for everyone which could then in turn make the exciting first year players break out quicker and/or avoid that typical freshmen late season breakdown.

I happen to think that he's onto something there, of course, 86 games, plus 8 in the preseason means camps would open Sept 1, (8 games player between Sept 8 and 27) and the Regular season would start October 1 and run to April 15, playoffs begin April 20 and run through June 25 like they do now.


**- Note from Hoosier Hockey's Peter Evans: There is just absolutely no way in the world that the Islanders would move out of that New York market. The amount of money they bring in, in terms of TV revenue and advertising dollars is just way too high to leave. The more likely option is that they either A) Move to Queens (next to Citi Field), B) Move into the Barclays Center in Brooklyn or the more likely C) They remain where they are with a new arena devoid of pretty much any of the things Wang wanted built with the Lighthouse Project.)

Reasonable Expectations: Andrej Meszaros and the rest of the Defense

Well, it is time once again for everyone to climb aboard the D-Train.

Just as we looked at the Flyers goaltending situation a few weeks ago, DGS is now taking a look at the defense corps. This time, we include best case scenario stat predictions for our Defensemen.

As in the Flyers defense, and this is a somewhat serious post as to what we can expect from our Flyers defensemen this year.

Once again, I have to make this perfectly clear: There is a huge DGS thank you to Don't Trade Vinny for his help with a lot of what you're seeing this week. I honestly could not have come up with all this without him.


Defensemen

3 Oskars Bartulis
6' 2" 184
Jan 21, 1987
Ogre, LVA


09-10 regular season stats

PHL: 53GP 1G 8A 9P 28PIMs

Review in a word: Ordinary
In a sentence: Bartulis didn't wow anyone, but for the most part, he also avoided major mess ups as well.

Forecast: he's gonna spell the 6 regulars and be the first guy inserted due to injury.

10-11 Numbers: 20GP 0g 5A 5P 10PIMs but plays solid D when we need him to


25 Matt Carle
6' 0" 205
Sep 25, 1984
Anchorage, AK, USA

09-10 regular season stats
80GP 6G 29A 35P 16PIMs

Review in a word: Suprising
In a sentence: Carle lived up this 3.437 cap hit and proved that he can be a future #2 NHL d-man.

Forecast: Can he repeat with improvements, Pronger and Timonen are both turning 36 this year, which means Carle and Coburn need to step it up and take on bigger minutes.

10-11 Numbers: 80GP 10g 35A 45P 20PIMs




5 Braydon Coburn
6' 5" 220
Feb 27, 1985
Shaunavon, SK, CAN

09-10 regular season stats
81GP 5G 14A 19P 54PIMs

Review in a word: Dissappointing
In a sentence: Coburn was horribly inconsistent during the regular season and honestly got way more than he should have on his contract.

Forecast: Like Matt Carle, Braydon Coburn needs to step up if the Flyers have a shot at repeating as Eastern Conference Champions.

10-11 Numbers: 80GP 7g 18A 25P 70PIMs

41 Andrej Meszaros
6' 2" 223
Oct 13, 1985
Povazska Bystrica, SVK


09-10 regular season stats (w/ TBL)
81GP 6G 11A 17P 50PIMs

Review in a word: Disaster
In a sentence: He can only go up, right?

Forecast: $4 million for #5 D-man, I swear, he better be good at something before Holmgren convinces Sutter to take Mesz for a first rounder

10-11 Numbers: 80GP 5g 15A 20P 50PIMs


6 Sean O'Donnell
6' 2" 237
Oct 13, 1971
Ottawa, ON, CAN

09-10 regular season stats (W/ LAK)
78GP 3G 12A 15P 70PIMs

Review in a word: Dependable
In a sentence: Solid proven winner with great leadership skills, enough said.

Forecast: Just needs to hold down the fort like he did in 2007 when the Ducks won the cup, I am not asking for much, just to be better than Ryan Parent.

10-11 Numbers: 70GP 2g 8A 10P 80PIMs


20 Chris Pronger
6' 6" 220
Oct 10, 1974
Dryden, ON, CAN


09-10 regular season stats
82GP 10G 45A 55P 79PIMs

Review in a word: Divine
In a sentence: Chris Pronger is awesome, divine and amazing.

Forecast: He turns 36, can he still keep it going.

10-11 Numbers: 80GP 7g 33A 40P 90PIMs




44 Kimmo Timonen
5' 10" 194
Mar 18, 1975
Kuopio, FIN

09-10 regular season stats
82GP 6G 33A 39P 50PIMs

Review in a word: Dependable
In a sentence: I love Kimmo, I do, but, at the same time, I'm reminded that Kimmo carries a 6.33 cap hit, then I don't love him so much anymore.

Forecast: He's old, and on the downside, this could be scary, or amazing.

10-11 Numbers: 80GP 5g 25A 30P 40PIMs






8 Matt Walker
6' 4" 215
Apr 7, 1980
Beaverlodge, AB, CAN

09-10 regular season stats (w/ TBL)
66GP 2G 3A 5P 90PIMs

Review in a word: Suck
In a sentence: It's Jimmy Vandermeer version 2.

Forecast: Should spend most of his time in the AHL.

10-11 Numbers: 30GP 0g 0A 0P 70PIMs







Other thoughts:

Meszaros's career numbers are like Coburn's so, I'm hoping that if the 2 of them get their stuff together then, good things will happen, if not, well, then I'm hoping we can pass them off to Calgary for something good.

Holmgren does have a habit of trading horrible defensemen for good things:

Case 1: Zhitnik for Coburn
Case 2: Downie/Eminger for Carle
Case 3: Tollefsen for Leino

Breaking News: Warrant Issued for Arrest of Steve Yzerman

So, for those of you following our good friend Don't Trade Vinny, you know that Bolts GM Steve Yzerman was recently arrested for trying to steal PK Subban from the Habs. It turns out, that Stevie's bad luck continued as after leaving Montreal, he had to fly back to Tampa. During this time, a grand jury was convened in Philadelphia.

See it turns out that Stevie's legal issues are not over. Apparently many people associated with the NHL think that Stevie committed robbery of the Philadelphia Flyers. Turns out, a source let me in on the fact that Stevie IS under investigation. Needless to say, we started digging around as well.

Thanks to a joint investigation by the DGS-SuperSpies and our friends at Don't Trade Vinny, we managed to obtain a copy of the warrant for Stevie's arrest. For you're viewing pleasure, we have it here for you to see. By the way, if you're not reading Don't Trade Vinny, you're really missing out, so start reading his site today.



(use view image to maximize the ability to see it)

Tuesday Morning Coffee Break: August 3

Hey, it's been a long time since I did one of these, but never fear, we have another coffee break for you.

So sit back, grab a coffee, some donuts, and enjoy some great hockey related fun.

• Down Goes Brown delivers a look at other grievances the NHLPA has filed along with the Ilya Kovalchuk grievance. Needless to say, I have one of my own to add, I hereby declare DGB to be the funniest Maple Leafs blogger/writer on the planet. I now have a grievance that he does not post enough.
• Blades of Funny tells us there's nothing to write about, but delivers an amazing post making me wish I had nothing to write about as well.
• Intent to Blow goes on an in depth investigation to tell us just how Sami Salo got hurt this last time around. The results are hilarious and involve Sedin jokes.
• Stay Classy takes a nice look at Down Goes Brown's writing talent and the fact that DGB finally made it big-time. We hope DGB doesn't take up any of the positions for his writing that Stay Classy has told him to go after.
• Don't Trade Vinny gives us the latest in the Stevie Saga with a look at Mr. Yzerman's recent arrest in Montreal. Why do I have an odd feeling this isn't the end of Steve Yzerman's legal trouble? Check back tomorrow to find out why because the DGS-SuperSpies are on the case.

Seeing the Brightside, A DGS look at the Gagne trade

I've waited to post this, mainly because I wanted to avoid an unoriginal and pathetic rant about how much I miss Simon. Quite honestly, for that, my Twitter feed to the right should have supplied plenty of that. (Ain't I right DTV?)

With that, I recently posted an analysis on Blades of Funny of some of Holmgren's trades, here's what I came up...reposted here for my loyal DGS-ers



Let’s take a quick look on some of Paul Holmgren’s odd moves

Case 1: Trading Alex Zhitnik to ATL for Braydon Coburn

Well, this was basically a steal for the Flyers

Case 2: Trading Peter Forsberg to Nashville for Upshall, Parent and 2 draft picks
Then trading the picks back to NSH for Scott Hartnell and Kimmo Timonen

ok, so Parent’s back in NSH, Upshall got kicked to Phoenix for Carcillo, Kimmo and Harts are gonna end up killing our cap barring some more moves, but these guys did produce in Philly (except Parent in the Finals)

Case 3: Upshall to PHX for Dan Carcillo

I dislike Carcillo, no denials, but the fact is, Upshall wasn’t gonna see top line time as an RW with Joffrey Lupul and Mike Knuble ahead of him. Well, what if he stayed for 09-10 you say, and I say fine, where would Briere, Carter, Giroux, Lappy be moved to in order to find a slot for Upshall. I love Upshall, yes, but he wasn’t gonna fit in and so getting something for him was a good deal.




Case 4: Parent to NSH for a 7th rounder and Rights to Dam Hamhuis,
NSH 7th Rounder to SJS for Rights to Nabby
Rights to Dan Hamhuis to Pittsburgh for a 3rd Rounder

Wait, Ryan Parent, Ryan F-ing Parent for a third rounder from the Penguins, uhh, steal…duh

Case 5: Ole Tollefsen and 2nd rounder for Ville Leino

Tollefsen’s in the SEL, and Leino lit up everyone he saw in the playoffs, epic win enough said.





So, Holmgren has a knack for getting stuff done…trading Gagne and 2nd round pick for a 4th, Meszaros and Walker might just work out…if not, then my final example…

Case 6: Steve Eminger and Steve Downie to Tampa for Matt Carle…yes Homer has a way of moving Bad D-men out for good ones…



my pick for the 2010 edition

Andrej Meszaros and Dan Carcillo somewhere for a D-man who doesn't suck...guess that excludes Wade Redden, Tomas Kaberle, and Mike Green*

*-(Editor's Note: Why Mike Green made a list of DEFENSEMEN is beyond me)




I wish Gagne the best of luck but if he comes up gimpy in a game with the groin, or takes a Matt Cooke elbow…I won’t be surprised

Stolen Posts: How the world beat DGS to ideas recently

Just a couple days ago, the blogging idol of DGS, Mr. Down Goes Brown, posted a comparison between NHL and NBA Free Agency and DGS was sad, because we had the same idea for a post in mind. DGB suggested that we pre-date the post and then accuse him of plagiarism but we decided against it. Instead, we decided to share our thoughts on the idea of tampering in NHL.

Thanks to @NonAmericanHero on Twitter for telling us that the CBA has no rules of tampering, so because of that DGS sent the DGS SuperSpies into the world to find out, what is tampering in the NHL. The results, they were odd, but enlightening to say the least.

Some NHL Examples of Tampering.

• Brian Burke of the Toronto Maple Leafs takes a trip to Sweden for a "vacation" only to end up accidentally recruiting the Sedins.
• Marian Hossa tampers with the Red Wings chances of repeating as Stanley Cup champions by signing with them after the 2008 season
• Flyers GMs since 1997 have tampered with the teams chances of winning a Stanley Cup by never signing a competent goaltender, (Remind me again why were paying Big Mesz $4 million and Nabby walked to the KHL?)
• Alexei Yashin tampered with the Islanders books by penciling his name on them until 2020
• Someone tampered with Rick DiPietro's health sending him for MRI's every year, (this just in...Rick has a minimum 5 MRIs per week clause in his contract)
• Chicago Blackhawks ownership tampered with the whole NHL by secretly moving the team to Atlanta after winning the 2010 Stanley Cup
• Kyle Wellwood tampered with the last scale he was on, making it say 181lbs as his weight.
• An unknown person or persons tampered with Ilya Kovalchuk's calendar causing him to not realize that in fact, he legally can sign an NHL contract.
• Rick Tocchet tampered with the Lightning's chances to win by hating on a guy named Vinny. (Thanks DTV)
• Someone tampers with Joe Thornton's mind every time the playoffs role around
• Keith Ballard likes to tamper with the skull of his team's goaltender
• Pierre McGuire will tamper with your belt and pants every time he interviews you.
• Every NHL player attempts to tamper with the Edmonton Oilers by demanding a trade out of Edmonton.
• Rangers GM Glen Sather tampered with Habs by convincing them to take on the Scott Gomez contract.
• Chris Pronger uses his elbows to tamper with opponent's skulls.
  

[Note: Eklund claims these ideas are all 100% DGS Originals (e4)]

Things We Did to Ourselves To Remind Us How Much July 1 Sucked

First off, to any and all Canadian readers, DGS wishes you a Happy Canada Day again.


DGS felt a lot of pain

Amy: Considered dying her hair black again, she had it done orange on June 29.

Luc: Played out Free Agency on NHL 10, made reasonable moves, got a reasonable team, simulated 2010-2011 season, watched Flyers win come in 4th in Eastern Conference, 2nd in Atlantic Division (NY Islanders won it). Watched them beat San Jose in the Stanley Cup Finals in 7 games (Thorton played in 22 playoff games, had 11 pts...talk about realism).

Luc's opening day Flyers roster

Gagne-Richards-Carter
Hartnell-Briere-Leino
JvR-Giroux-Powe
Lappy-Betts-Carcillo

Nodl-Cote

Pronger-Timonen
Coburn-Lydman
Carle-Bartulis

Sloane-Mormina-Syvret

Turco-Leighton
Backlund


Big Mid-season Trade: Sent Gagne and Hartnell to Calgary for Jarome Iginla and a 1st round pick (ended up being 3rd overall)

Signed Alex Frolov during January, 6.4 cap hit over 4 years (prorated for the rest of the season)

Frolov:

GP: 32 G: 15 A: 14 P: 29 PIMs: 8

Iggy's Flyers Stats:

GP: 14 G: 7 A: 5 PIMs: 23


Leading Scorers

G: Carter 44
A: Richards 64
P: Carter: 101


Other Stats

+/-: Pronger +52
PIMS: Carcillo 245

Goalies:

Turco: 31-20-10
Leighton: 10-3-7
Backlund: 0-0-1

Yeah, Luc insisted we put this all in.

Turco was a 3.7 cap hit.


Playoff Leaders:

Goalie:
Turco: 15-8

Scoring
G: Briere 20
A: Pronger/Richards 24
P: Briere/Richards 33

Luc got into this, again, everything was simmed except roster moves.



Matt: Waterboarded himself in the shower, Waffleboarded himself after, Pinched himself in the hopes that he would wake up, begged for a Big Mesz trade to Calgary for Jarome Iginla, cried repeatedly for his bottle, rationalized that being single is a good thing, wished #DGSDateWatch would end, tried to "fire" the rest of the team, plotted the demise of Homer, came up with a clever post for next week that involves teaming with Don't Trade Vinny.




Basically, today sucked for the Flyers, prove us wrong, please.

An Open Letter, to Dan Hamhuis

So apparently Dan Hamhuis would not sign with the Flyers, he wanted to be a #2 D-man, something he would not be able to do in Philly with the likes of Pronger, Carle, Timonen ahead of him. In the interest of intellectual discourse, and following in the spirit of Down Goes Brown and Don't Trade Vinny, we here at DGS present an open letter to Dan Hamhuis.




Hey, egocentric dirtbag!

Listen up! What the hell is wrong with you? We offered you the money you wanted and a chance to win, but no, you have to be the center of freaking attention. In case you didn't notice, you were traded for Ryan Parent. Let's realize this, Ryan Parent has a shot so weak, he couldn't beat Toskala's glove. So now you just got traded to the Penguins, who basically are using you to drive down the price to keep Sergei Gonchar. They don't want you, we did. Had you signed the deal Holmgren wanted to give you, we would have put a Stanley Cup winning team together, dominated the east, and won a cup. But no, for you, it's not about winning, it's not even about money, it's about being the center of attention. Get your head in the game, until then, you don't deserve to win, you don't deserve anything.

By the way, all may be forgiven. If you don't sign in Pittsburgh and come running back to Homer on July 1 begging for his offer, then guess what, you will become a hero to this city, because, not only did you join us, but you stole something from the Penguins. And Chris Pronger will be proud, he stole pucks, you stole picks. Just, don't get yourself suspended for any kind of tampering or anything along the way.

Sincerely,

Flyers Fans

Tuesday Morning Coffee Break: June 29

Hey hey, another coffee break, another day to wonder about what else is going on in the hockey world. Guess what, DGS has the answers, check them out below.

• Grades on the Draft: Brought to you by Puck Daddy at Yahoo sports. He handles this with his normal style and flair, good draft day post, also, saves me the time of grading NHL teams not based in Philadelphia.
• The Hall of Fame: Our Blogging Idol, Down Goes Brown looks at the cases for the Hockey Hall of Fame, he comes with interesting conclusions, hilarity ensues.
• Meet Guy Boucher: DGS's blogging brother, Don't Trade Vinny, helps Bolts fans get to know new coach Guy Boucher by comparing him to previous coach Rick Tocchet. First time I read this, I legitimately almost choked to death on the pizza I was eating.
• Source of NHL Trade Rumors Revealed: Coming to you with Intent to Blow, err..from Intent to Blow, yeah, they have how NHL trade rumors get made, Eklund is again, the worst source ever.

And for a non hockey perspective on the offseason; WingsWinEh discusses animal mating rituals. Kinda creepy but fun none the less.

Ways DGS is Surviving Until July 1

Ok, July 1 is still a few days a way. And with that, DGS has a list of things you can do to survive until then without going crazy, and still getting your hockey fix.

• Sporcle's sports section: A gaming site for trivia and brain teasers, a lot of fun ways to kill time playing the hockey, or other sports related games. A favorite of the DGS Staff when killing time.
• Ctrl/Alt/Del or XKCD : Yes I know, not quite hockey related, but still, a good way to relax and have a laugh, especially useful for players just drafted by the Oilers.
• Photoshopping fun: Ask Don't Trade Vinny about that, seriously funny, and almost always leads to a good time.
  
• World of Warcraft: Seriously, it works for me, that is until I want a girlfriend...(Amy's Note: This can be dangerous for anyone in a relationship.)
• Start Your Own Hockey Blog: In all fairness, you can talk to the world about the sport, and have your views heard...err..read.