Last time I did this, it turned into a fairly moderate success, I partnered up with Don't Trade Vinny on that one when we did our misused hockey terms. This is what DTV had, and the official DGS reply.
So with the consent of the writer, here I go.
I'll start with what I wrote in the comments section of the original post.
The Jeff Carter: When not scoring on the ice, I score with my winger’s wife off it.
The Ian Laperriere: Block shots to the point where I have no face left.
The Chris Pronger: Use my elbows to leave opposing players looking up at me
The Stay-In The Kitchen Defensemen: A stay home defensemen with agoraphobia.
NHL Comparables: Wade Redden, Andrej Meszaros, every current blueliner on the Dallas Stars
NHL Comparables: Wade Redden, Andrej Meszaros, every current blueliner on the Dallas Stars
The DJ-Goaltender: A goalie who loves strobe lights and goal horns followed by music.
NHL Comparables: Vesa ToskaLOL, Andrew Raycroft, CristoLOL Huet (Kevin added Pascal LOL-claire)
NHL Comparables: Vesa ToskaLOL, Andrew Raycroft, CristoLOL Huet (Kevin added Pascal LOL-claire)
The True Stay At Home D-man: A defensemen who really stays at home, even when under pressure.NHL Comparables: Sami Salo, Mike Van Ryn, Paul Ranger
Moving on.
The Patient Forward: This guy is known for always being patient. As in a patient at the local hospital waiting for MRIs because he's always hurt.
NHL Examples: Marian Gaborik, Simon Gagne, Doug Weight, Paul Kariya
The Harry Potter: This guy is known for being totally invisible, like Harry Potter when under the Invisibility Cloak. You just never see him do anything even when he's on the ice.
NHL Examples: Lee Stempniak, Joe Thornton and Alex Semin during the post-season,
The Grinder (or hoagie, sub, sandwich): This guy loves his food. Enough said.
NHL Examples: Martin Brodeur, Tim Thomas, Kyle Wellwood
The Rioter: This guy is really talented, but he's somewhat reckless and therefore violence always seem to follow him, especially when he's playing well.
NHL Examples: Steve Downie, Dan Carcillo, every Montreal Canadiens player who caused a riot during the 2010 playoff run.
The Houdini Defensemen: This guy always seems to pull a disappearing act, especially when in the Defensive Zone.
NHL Examples: Mike Green, Tomas Kaberle, Lukas Krajicek, The Boston Bruins after the 1st period of Game 7 against the Flyers
The We Have A Legend Only Not: This guy shares a nickname with an NHL legend, too bad he doesn't play like one.
NHL Examples: Robert Esche, Ryan Parent, The 4th NHL Staal brother: Jarrett Stoll
The Smart Guy: This guy always seems to use his head or the heads of others to help his team out.
NHL Examples: Ian Laperriere, Roman Cechmanek, Goalies playing behind Keith Ballard
The Psycho-analyst: This guy likes to get into the heads of opponents in order to make sure that his team always the psychological advantage. He usually does simple things to amuse the simple minds of his opponents.
NHL Examples: Chris Pronger, Steve Yzerman when proposing trades to Paul Holmgren
There you go, now you know
ya Stevie Y sure ripped off Holms in the Gagne deal ahhh.
ReplyDeleteYou know what makes you a great writer, the fact that even though your team is probably a favorite to win the Stanley Cup this season, you still find clever ways to make fun of them. Keep up the good work.
ReplyDeleteExcellent! My Dallas Stars defense jokes (read: reality) are spreading to other!
ReplyDeleteIf Jonathan Cheechoo is a Star (has been given pro-tryout with them) and James Neal still isn't resigned come training camp, I will never stop making fun of the Stars! You heard it here first.
ReplyDeleteNice work as always, DGS.