Ilya Kovalchuk comes clean about why he got scratched.

So tonight, the world was shocked when Ilya Kovalchuk was scratched by the Devils for last night's game. Luckily the DGS-SuperSpies were able to get a hold of Ilya after the game and ask him what was going on. With that, we have Ilya's reasons for why he got scratched, straight from his mouth.

(Editor's note: We were gonna run another psych profile today, but DGS had to go hurt his knee during a pickup hockey game)

• Needed time to be schooled in the idea of playing defensively on the ice
• Has a little known "reverse Escrow clause" in his contract, he gets paid 100% of his contract but will miss 18% of games over the 15 years.
• Needed to visit his shrink to talk about the depression of spending 15 years in NJ.
• Just realized that he agreed to spend 15 years in NJ
• Threw a hissy fit because Martin Brodeur ate his pregame meal
• Told the coaching staff he wanted a "nap time" clause during games in the manner of Ondrej Pavelec
• Had to fulfill his role as a Russian Spy.
• Wanted to fly back to Russia to have his family from famine caused by Kyle Wellwood playing in the KHL.
• Didn't see the need to dress as Buffalo lacks enforcers. (Stick tap to Kevin S. of In Lou We Trust)

NHL 2010-2011 Season Previews: Northeast Division

With the season coming up soon enough. I think it's time to get a look at what team's have been working on during training camp. Lucky for you, the DGS-SuperSpies uncovered what's going on behind the scenes at all 30 NHL team's training camps. As a responsible human being, I have decided to post the shocking findings here for you to see. Today, we start with the Northeast division.

Montreal Canadiens

The Good: Will save money on pregame meals by being able to serve forwards from the kids menu.

The Bad: Decided to follow an idea presented by Down Goes Brown during the first around of the playoffs and are apparently going to start "Empty Net" as their goalie.

Secret Strategy for the New Season: Players have worked on riot escape in practice as Montreal citizens tend to riot after every game regardless of result.

Toronto Maple Leafs

The Good: Can avoid worrying about such debates as "Who to draft in 2011?" because of their lack of draft picks.

The Bad: Have yet to find a way to remove Tomas Kaberle from the team.

Secret Strategy for the New Season: Will magically improve forward depth by re-signing Vesa Toskala and converting him to center.

Boston Bruins

The Good: Due the NHL's Salary Cap, the Bruins roster is set in stone with players such as Tim Thomas and Marc Savard still on the active roster and no way to move them.

The Bad: Will be forced to place Marc Savard on LTIR after he accidentally runs into Zdeno Chara's knee during practice causing Savard to suffer a concussion.

Secret Strategy for the New Season: Will avoid blowing 3-0 leads in the post-season by avoiding the post season altogether.

Ottawa Senators

The Good: Have 2 great backup goaltenders who are great for 10-15 games a season

The Bad: Have a player married to Carrie Underwood, picking up Tony Romo's sloppy seconds has been known to cause problems.

Secret Strategy for the New Season: When in doubt, the fire the coach.

Buffalo Sabres

The Good:Have a GM who's willing to save players like Tomas Vanek from signing with Edmonton.

The Bad: Will no longer be able to score easy goals due to the fact that Vesa Toskala is no longer a goalie in this division.

Secret Strategy for the New Season: Will continue to fly under the radar and ride Ryan Miller for as long