Fan vs Fan

Friday, November 19, 2010

Ellis, Smith, Boucher and Bob's excuses for not showing up to last night's game

So last night the Flyers played the Bolts in a nice football game and because the Bolts went for 2, they won 8-7. Luckily after the game, the DGS-SuperSpies were able to hear all the excuses given by all 4 goaltenders for why they weren't at last night's game. Some were rather eye opening to say the least.

Sergei Bobrovsky:

  • Was unprepared for the game due to the fact that he's been listening to a certain song over and over again.
  • After losing 3-0 to the Habs a couple nights earlier, Bobs was letting pucks in because he was told by Jeff Reese, "as a stud rookie goalie, you basically want to be the opposite of Carey Price"
  • Due to errors in translation, when told to model his game after a well known goalie wearing #35, he decided to imitate Vesa Toskala rather than someone who could actually be an effective goalie.
Dan Ellis
  • Make your own "Dan Ellis Problems" joke here.
  • Thought that since he loses 18% of salary to ESCROW, he only needs to stop 18% of pucks.
  • Because, well, since he only makes $1.5M by his own claims, he's not as good as goalies like Michael Leighton, Sergei Bobrovsky or any other goalie who makes more than he does.
Brian Boucher
  • Thought he was stopping pucks because "boo!" sounds "BOOSH!"
  • Since he hadn't played in forever, he just assumed that he was going in net for another practice and because of that failed the realize that this one counted.
  • Because well, seriously people, when was Brian Boucher ever good.
Mike Smith
  • Was too busy trying to figure out why he was getting the fail whale on Twitter.
  • All the red lights he saw before entering the game caused him to go blind from the bench.
  • Hey, he won the game, didn't he?

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