Fan vs Fan

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Flyers Excuses For Tonight's Pitiful Effort

So the Flyers gave a pitiful effort tonight in a 2-1 loss to the Blue Jackets. Luckily, the DGS SuperSpies managed to get into the Flyers lockerroom and we heard all the excuses on why the Flyers sucked tonight.

Scott Hartnell: "I felt like I overskated the puck because of the lack of hair to slow me down."

Nik Zherdev: Was convinced that Mathieu Garon was a Russian mob boss even though Garon is 100% French Canadian. (Per his interpreter, a guy who might actually be in the Russian mob)

Sergei Bobrovsky: "Mr. Boss-Lavi put me on bench"

Jeff Carter: "The bleach in my hair sunk into my brain."

Chris Pronger: "I vowed to have one game where I didn't elbow someone's skull in, this was that game."

Claude Giroux: "Wait, there's an NHL team in Columbus, I thought the world was joking. Oh merde."

Andrej Meszaros: "Rick Tocchet thinks I'm awesome."

Michael Leighton: "I literally broke my back carrying this team to the Cup Finals last year, cut me some slack...seriously I'm LTIR right now"

Matt Carle: "I saw the Dallas Stars were playing well, so I decided to imitate their defensemen, sadly I imitated them from last year." (Jason better love this one)

(Warning: Bad Pun Alert)
Blair Betts: "Never got an effective warmup in because Rick Tocchet thinks I'm the team bookie"

Danny Briere: "I kept looking to pass the puck to Hartnell, but I could never find him on the ice."

And there you have it


  1. Sadly my favorite fellow DU alum imitated them from this year actually. They still blow.

    Also, the pun...OH GOD THE PUN!